Being Selfish

KP Rambles

It’s been a while. Sorry about that. This rambles is up on a weird day, I know, but with the holidays rolling around everything’s been a bit off. So likely don’t expect a regular schedule until later in January, but I hope to get something up by later next week!


The reason why I’ve been a bit absent amounts to a combination of many things. Primarily, the last few weeks of my classes for the semester, equating in many a paper and test that kept me very busy. Beyond that, I came home to Christmas preparations and family time in full swing, and also I’ve been a bit lazy, choosing to watch Netflix or read instead (speaking of, FINALLY finished Dance with Dragons, the last of Game of Thrones, after, like, four years–quite a success!).


For me, I’m celebrating Christmas. For you, it might be Hanukkah season. Or Kwanzaa or Winter Solstice. Or no holiday at all.


And while they’re all good and valid and true, a huge theme in many of them, particularly Christmas as I’m more familiar with that, is the spirit of giving. This spirit of the season gives people the opportunity to look to the less fortunate and help out as much as they can, which is wonderful.


Remarkable, even. That there’s just a certain time in the year when everyone sets aside to forget themselves and their personal struggles and remember how to be human and care for one another. The entire world, regardless of what you celebrate, comes together in the heart of winter to step back and regain a sense of who we are, that sense of care and kindness, a promise to the new year that this is how we should be and how we will work toward being. We’re not nearly there yet, and maybe we never will be there, but it’s the time of year we remember kindness and charity and sharing is caring and all those good things.


And I could write a whole ramble about how you should be giving this season. Who you can give to, why you should care. All very valid and worthy things to write about. But instead, I’m going to actually tell you to be selfish.


Now, don’t get me wrong; the giving spirit is wonderful and amazing and all good. But we place a stigma in society on being selfish or self-centered. Due to good reason, of course, but I think sometimes it goes too far.


With the holidays and family (or not family) and the pressure to give gifts and volunteer and help others help others help others, the whole “self” thing can get lost in the shuffle. Some people give and give and give themselves and leave nothing left behind. Giving presents or time or energy or emotion to others, especially when that care, whatever it may be, is not reciprocated, can be so draining, and ultimately you can lose who you are in the shuffle.


That’s why I’m challenging you to be selfish if you find yourself feeling empty from giving everything away to others. Find the time to regain your humanity, not just by giving to others but by taking a little for yourself. Whether this selfishness is a present for yourself or some time alone reading or watching what you want to on Netflix or simply staring out at the falling snow with a cup of hot chocolate and wrapped in a blanket, take the time to do it.


Your mental health is as important as anyone else’s joy or happiness that you might be giving them, so put it as a priority. Don’t make light of it, like society would like you to, and concentrate on yourself, too, this holiday season. Safely secure your own oxygen mask before helping others.


Whichever holiday you celebrate, I hope it’s merry and happy, joyful and bright. Whatever this winter season brings you, I think you can get through it, as long as you don’t forget that you deserve to give to yourself as well. You can be selfless and selfish. Just learn to balance.


Like I said, I will hopefully be back next week with a story or too. As always, please leave a like or comment or whatever and share with your friends if you like! Also, don’t forget to follow my Instagram page @kpwritingsblog for more updates! Comment down below with any ideas you would like to see me write about in the future!


With love and good vibes and happy, happy holidays,



Photo courtesy of my family’s Christmas tree! 🙂

One thought on “Being Selfish

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  1. Awesome post! You talk about something really important. We talk a lot about the need for self care, or being a little selfish, in grad school!. Your post also reminded me of a quote a professor told me once “you can’t pour from an empty cup, make sure to take care of yourself first.” We can’t be selfless unless we’re a little selfish first!


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